How to remain positive and focus when things you do is never good enough for your husband?

Constant roller coaster ride with my husband...can be some happiness but a whole of not. Always been critical with yelling if I do not agree with what he says and disregard of my feelings when I am feeling down. But then things can look bright and then it happens again. This has been happening for over 10 yrs and I am tired. I read that when your spouse tries to be negative and makes you feel that you are not good enough to just ignore him and not allow him to control your happiness. I have tried to do this to remain focus and positive for the sake of my kids (9 yr old and 12) but the flame is dying. I have always loved him because he can be so loving and fun to be around with but when the stress hits him his other personality kicks in and it is down hill after that. Any advice how anything worked to remain positive or has anyone just gave up?